The Superpower of Curiosity
Curiosity is a strength we're born with. The world is new to us! We want to understand it, so we test the waters, question, experiment and learn. But it can easily take a backseat as we get older. That’s unfortunate, because curiosity is a great tool to help us come back into the present moment—where we can view a situation from multiple angles and perspectives, putting us in position to make more optimal decisions.
One of my favorite techniques for coming back into the present moment is to reframe a challenging situation with questions that allow me to observe the situation without attaching to it. When we attach too tightly to a situation we naturally inhibit our curiosity, pushing us to accept the first, and sometimes least optimal, answer.
Two big fans of curiosity are Karolin Helbig and Minette Norman, authors of The Psychological Safety Playbook that I referenced in last month's newsletter.
"Curiosity is a leader's superpower. It's the antidote to anxiety and self-absorption, and it fuels learning and connection."
A client once referred to my curiosity by stating, “You’re great at rooting around.” While I'm grateful for that comment, curiosity is definitely a practice for me! And if I am under assault by my Insane Thought Generator and lost in the self-absorption Karolin and Minette referenced, I definitely have to use a technique (or two) to activate my curiosity. Here are three of my favorite techniques. Give these three a shot if you’re looking to improve your ‘rooting around’.
Three Tips to Activate Your Curiosity
Create frameworks. One of my favorite frameworks is the 3x3. I use it at the beginning of one-on-one jam sessions with clients by asking the client to share three highlights and three lowlights since our last call. This technique brings us both into the present moment, and helps us focus on what really matters. It also opens up mindfulness.
Have a ‘go to’ question. Using a “go to” question is a practice I use to jump start my curiosity. My all-time favorite? “What are the big rocks you and your team are focused on?” I recently had an introductory call with the CEO of an organization that's experienced significant growth over the last year. I jumped into the conversation by asking about the big rocks he and his team are focused on to build on that growth heading into the new year.
Say "tell me more." If you've listened to one of my appearances on 20 Minutes with Bronwyn, you'll hear me say something like, "You don't have to work for the negative. You do have to work for the positive." Then you'll hear Bronwyn say, "Tell me more about that." She's a master at using curiosity to draw out richer, more meaningful insights in conversations. And although I've never asked her this, I suspect she also uses the "tell me more technique" to take a breath as her big beautiful brain plans the transition to the next topic.
How can I help?
How can I help you and your team put a giant exclamation point on 2023 and enter 2024 with intention? Here are three ways I'm doing that with other clients. If any of these would be helpful, just reply to this email and let's set up a time to jam!
Assist with Big Rock planning for 2024.
Facilitate a Breakthrough Offsite with your leadership team.
Help your team with communicating courageously in the face of constant change.
PS: Looking for more 'go to' questions? Earlier this year I curated a list of ten thought provoking questions from my 1:1 coaching -- the questions that have clients responding with "That's a really good question! I am definitely going to spend time with it." These questions are also great for helping participants at an offsite get curious about their colleagues!